Mid-January Update

It is the Tuesday of the middle week of January.  School finally started again yesterday, after an entire month's break, and Emerson and Hibiscus were on the bus at 7:40.  Somewhere around ten, I decided that maybe I didn't hate Uganda quite as much if I had a quiet house and the chance to get some exercise, and the thought of doing errands didn't make me feel like crying if I could just wear whatever child needed to go with me.  (Actually, I was just having the conversation with some other babywearing moms, that errands would be much better if we could logistically manage to wear the older ones, and just let the baby toddle around.  Babies can't get into nearly as much trouble as over-active school-aged children.)

Mid-morning, Buttercup and I went for a walk.  I decided that we didn't have to have a goal in mind, and we just went up and down the steep roads in our new neighborhood, seeing the scenery, looking out over Lake Victoria, and exploring whether or not the roads went through to the other roads that were directly in front of the road in question.  (In general, no; they all got to the wall of some compound or other and just stopped.)  We set off, and this is how our walk was going along:

Walk, walk, walk.  Look, look, look.
Buttercup: mm, mm.  Duck, hmm.
Walk, walk, walk.
Buttercup: Five little ducks... hm, hmm...
Mama: Would you like me to sing Five Little Ducks?
Buttercup: Yes!
Mama sings Five Little Ducks, once through, with Buttercup either listening or singing the same words, and the same music, at the same time.
Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.
Buttercup: See da fow-ah, Mama?
Mama: Yes, I see a pretty red flower.
Buttercup: Petty red fow-ah.
Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.
Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.

Ah.  Happy introvert time!

After our walk, we had lunch, and got the downstairs of the house tidied and cleaned up.  Somehow, that has not happened in the entire month that we have lived in this house!  It is very refreshing.  Then the bus brought the kids home, and they all played outside while I finished ironing my wraps and blouses, which have been waiting around in wrinkly piles.  It was a wonderful day, even though the Embassy was supposed to call me with an appointment time and they didn't. Although it ended very tired, as my little band of monkeys got up to quite a bit of mama-exhausting-ness in their last few hours, and of course created a whole new big-issue problem to worry about.  I think I'm not bothering to worry about it yet, though.


Today, we had errands to do.  We actually went out with another adopting family whom we are getting to know, which meant that there were adult human beings to talk with me!  We stopped by the kids' school, which is in a new building, and got a tour and a lot of enthusiasm from our friend Derrick, who runs the school.  Then we all went to lunch together, and the company was exciting for both Buttercup and I.  For me, there was actual conversation, with people saying things and then not talking for a little while when someone else said something, and then basing their next comments on what they just heard the other person say.  Conversation is an amazing art.  Meanwhile, Buttercup was amazed to be the "big girl in town," with little one-year-old Sorrel watching her attentively and trying to bang on her arm.  She is used to being the baby and spending all her energy trying to keep up with bigger children, and being rebuffed half the time.  One could just see the wheels turning in her head as she tried to imagine getting to be in the other role!  I can't wait to get her home to America, where she can spend time with kids her own age, and do activities designed for little people.

We left our friends shopping there, and went into town to the lawyer's office and the post office.  It was by far my smoothest post office experience yet, except for the reason I was there: picking up a package that was mailed in SEPTEMBER.  I had given it up for lost when Miss B gave me the package slip a couple of days ago!

Then we got our friends, dropped them at home, picked the children up from school, checked on a horse-riding lesson, and went home, all with no calls from the Embassy.  But when I got home, I found an email.


Let me give a quick refresher course about what I expected; what the Embassy explained in their little class, which matched what the adoption agency told us, and the experience of other parents whom I have talked with.  You have the paperwork-intake appointment.  Then they give you the next appointment for a hearing, which is a specific time on Monday or Wednesday afternoons, and tell you who and what you need to bring with you, and any other details specific to your case.  Then you come with the children, any living birth parents, NO lawyers or adoption workers, and you go over your huge pile of paperwork and they acknowledge that the children are legal orphans, and two days later you get your exit paperwork.

And here is what happened.  They took the paperwork, didn't have any knowledge about my case in particular, said "we'll call you some time, like maybe Monday," and confirmed my phone number. They didn't call Monday.  They didn't call Tuesday.  They sent an email on Tuesday, telling us to be there Wednesday, but -- here comes the weird part -- it isn't an actual appointment for us, they are telling all the families to come at the same time on Wednesday afternoon, and they'll "get through as many as possible," but to be prepared for a long wait.  In other words, I need to collect my three crazy children, arrive at nap time and stay through The Witching Hour, sit around in a crowded room filled with other nervous parents and even more chaotic children, and possibly or possibly not have our hearing.  Meanwhile, we also need to collect the parents or possibly someone else, since we haven't heard details about whom or what we need to bring, who are at best sick and weak and tired, and at worse delirious or missing entirely, and they also need to sit around all afternoon and maybe we will have an appointment and maybe we won't.  Doesn't that sound wonderful?

It remains to hope that the last two phrases of the original description remain valid.  I will not complain about sitting around if we walk out with a promise of paperwork, so I shouldn't be complaining ahead of time.  But I can't actually believe that it is going to happen!  Especially now that the children are back at school, it seems like we are back in our cheerful little holding pattern, and will remain circling for an unidentified period.

So that's the update!  We'll see what I am able to write tomorrow!